Caluroso

"I was recently going through my camera roll trying to find a photo that showed my most depressed point, what I ended up finding were photos of me smiling which truthfully explains it so much better than any sad photo could. When you think about depression you probably think of someone looking a bit like Eeyore, right? Instincively, you might think of the person who has stopped functioning - no energy to move off the couch, crying all the time, etc and that's true too (i've been both) more commonly though, depression looks like the friend who's happy, or the person who puts everyone else first, or the person who keeps themselves constantly busy. That's the trouble with depression it's frighteningly easy to hide, especially if you're not looking for the subtleties. When I look back at the points that lead up to when I stopped functioning, there were some tell-tale signs along the way to it - my appearance changed pretty drastically, I'd gained a lot of weight, I was unkempt and had no pride in myself, I started to withdraw socially, I was drinking more in both volume and frequency, constantly puffing on a vape to ease my anxiety and mind, I could go on for days tbh. From the outside I'm certain most people would of seen me and thought wow Nikki has really let herself go, I was smiling to the world, so it could be assumed I was fine, yet the truth is I was struggling and hiding it behind a smiling face. It's pretty easy to judge other people, we have all been guilty of it at one point in our lives, yet everyone is fighting battles we all"

"One of the best aspects of posing is how empowering it is when you have fun, let loose and bring you into it. It's an expression and performance of you, that's what creates the magic ✨️ Whether your vibe is sexy, bad bitch, sassy, fierce, sensual, cute, camp, playful, strong, funny etc you can create a routine that displays exactly that and as a result exactly who you are. It truely is an art form and one that i am so grateful @theonlymaheen has given me so much creative freedom with. Posing has taught me more about confidence and loving who I see in the mirror more than anything else. Week by week I see this Nikki that was always there but lacked the confidence, or place to lean into it, come out to play and i think dayum, there she is 😍🔥😈 It's taught me there is no shame in being confident (imma go into this in another post later) - it's sexy and magnetic. You've gotta own that shit, lean into it and send it baby. I genuinely can't wait to bring our art to life on stage in a sparkly bikini in less than 5 weeks and show everyone who i am 😍. Until then we keep working to make it as close to a masterpiece as possible 🎨 What is your posing vibe and what do you think mine is? 😜"

"Your great life isn't going to be achieved by playing it small, risk being seen in all of your glory ✨️ Own it. Lean into it. Send it 🌞🌻 . . . . . . . . . . . . . #motivation #wbff #fitness #discipline #health #ownitleanintoitsendit #wbffcompetitor #mindset #growthmindset #queen #bigqueenenergy #confidence #empowerment #sobriety #soberissexy #soberlife #alcoholfree #freedom #photoshoot"

"The amazing duo @kristinvenae & @michaelelbacha_official Congratulations on your new show ❤️ #ishtarphotography #photooftheday #photo #photographer #photography #photoshoot #makeupartist #model #موديلات #photosessions #photograph #modeling #makeup #trend #photobomb #photoaday #makeup #photowall #photographylovers #makeuptutorial #photomodel #photogenic #photograpy #photoart #fashionstyle #fashionista #fashionblogger"

"Gorgeous model @chrissys_modelling_ #ishtarphotography #photooftheday #photo #photographer #photography #photoshoot #makeupartist #model #موديلات #photosessions #photograph #modeling #makeup #trend #photobomb #photoaday #makeup #photowall #photographylovers #makeuptutorial #photomodel #photogenic #photograpy #photoart #fashionstyle #fashionista #fashionblogger #fashionweek"

"The gorgeous @glowithlili and the amazing @jojosebastianofficial At: @mrsaustraliainternational @beautynbrainsaustralia Head design @ahkimartofhair #ishtarphotography #photooftheday #photo #photographer #photography #photoshoot #makeupartist #model #موديلات #photosessions #photograph #modeling #makeup #trend #photobomb #photoaday #makeup #photowall #photographylovers #makeuptutorial #photomodel #photogenic #photograpy #photoart #fashionstyle #fashionista #fashionblogger #fashionweek"